'L'

A moment of proactiveness...?

Thu, 15 May 2008 08:21:29 GMT

So I wrote an article. Then I submitted it along with a cover letter (with mucho help from mah friends D and B, <3) to a newspaper editor in hopes of it getting published. Mostly to start some sorta portfolio. Vague hope of having people offer me money to write for them. (ha, like I can count on that...)

Yay?

Blah.

Tue, 13 May 2008 06:33:17 GMT

I'm in a totally blah mood at the moment. Just frustrated with.. things.

Frustrated with art, because I just tried to make a video of me doing random sketches and I hate ALL of the sketches. Though I'm still putting it up cuz I went through the freaking trouble to take the video. (Which I do with ZD Soft Screen Recording software, btw. Which is very much free!) I think it'd be easier for me to do that if I had more RAM. Yay still only having 256 MB of RAM.

Frustrated with RP, because... I dunno.. I guess tonight it just wasn't working? I wasn't feeling it? It just didn't work. And then I was all "Oh hay, I'll go play in the RDI for a change! But.. wait! I look in the list and I see the name of someone who I've pretty much given up RPing around. No, it's beyond giving up RPing with them. If I wasn't RPing with them? That'd be fine, but it goes beyond that. This person has to steal every spotlight for themselves, this person just always has to be the ... well I don't want to be too specific here. But it's to the point I don't even feel comfortable playing in the same room with them. That it's just a waste of my time, especially after trying to talk to them about my concerns (on more than one occasion) and pretty much receiving a "Yeah, whatever." Attitude.

Frustrated with everything else. Life feels monotonous. It's the same thing every day. Every day. Makes me feel like I'm going to crack sometimes. Nothing's changing in the near future either... so it's just.. more or less the same thing all the time. And people like to make it seem easy. Oh yes... They toss a sentence of advice my way and that's supposed to solve my problems! That's supposed to be the quick fix! When life sucks all we have to do is wave a magical wand around and BAM, fix'd!!

Don't have a job? Wave that wand! You have one now!

Feel depressed? Wave that wand! Now you're happy!

Being screamed at? Having people walk all over you? Well, duh. Do I have to say it? *nudges the wand*

I may do something strange and totally out of my comfort zone soon though. Just.. to do something.. different. Spark change. It involves a submission of writing to a newspaper. Possibly. I'm not getting my hopes up though. After all, L is obviously stupid and has no idea what she's doing simply because she doesn't have a college education. Without some degree in writing I may as well be a monkey bashing my feet into a typewriter.

Which brings me to yet another rant. Next time someone acts like I'm totally horrible or stupid or less of a person SIMPLY BECAUSE I haven't been to college, and you know, DON'T WANT to go to college? I'm going to possibly rip their face off. Especially the people who went to college and now have dead end jobs. Yeah, did them lots of good eh? I really hate it from *strangers* most of all, who are trying to make casual conversation.

Them: So, you going to college?

Me: Nope.

Them: Oh.. *sympathetic and/or judgmental sound/look*

Me: *seethes*

Okay, so before I go and wig out too much more, here is video of crappy sketches for your viewing displeasure. Yey..

Bored L is Bored.

Sat, 10 May 2008 22:56:53 GMT

Sooo...

I sketched an elf, and also made video of said sketching of said elf, blah de blah. Video is here. "Finished Product" is here.

I'd say something here to make this entry worth posting, but I can think of nothing. Anything on my mind is stuff best said not quite so publicly, so yeah.

Sat, 10 May 2008 16:11:24 GMT

I have entirely too many links in my bookmarks folder so I'm going through and deleting a lot of them. However I did find something that might be lolz for you all.

World's Worst Metaphors

Oh, and here's something nice for the artists!

Art Tutorials Wiki

Re-write and embarrassment.

Sat, 10 May 2008 00:00:27 GMT

As I said before in a previous entry I was going to take some really old writing and rewrite it with my current skills. Well... my old writing is really terrible and hollow and insubstantial so already I've managed to take a few lines and expand that to a few paragraphs. I may or may not (probably will) continue, but I think I have enough now to show a difference.

Alright, and this is actually pretty embarrassing for me, so I ask that you not be... awful, in regards to the old writing. You can laugh, but don't be cruel. I was 13-14 at the time, I didn't know what I was doing, the characterization was bad, there's no description, it's all cheesy dialouge, and anything you point out about it? I already know. I've already laughed at it and had my soul cry some because of it. :D

The re-written stuff, which doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of the scene, especially since I'm essentially having to revamp it all, you are more than welcome to offer constructive criticism to. After all, this is an exercise in improvement in writing.

=======

After a while and after fighting several monsters, Silas and Alina reached Maliza.

"It's so creepy..." Silas whispered.

Maliza seemed dark, literally. The sky was too dark for the time of day and several ruffians were walking around. The houses looked all dilapidated and a light smoke of pollution floated about the air.

"Hey baby..." a voice sounded behind Silas. He and Alina turned around.

A tall blonde woman stood behind them. She was wearing a *very* revealing dress. She had a white fur coat on over her purple dress. She was wearing very expensive jewelry and had a cigarette in her hand. She was eyeing Silas.

"Mmmm.. you're cute..." she said in a sinister voice. "just like that other boy..."

"other.. boy?" Silas asked.

"oh.. enough small talk..." she lifted up her hand and started playing with Silas' hair. "You wanna buy my merchandise or not?"

Silas grinned as she flipped his hair around. "Merchandise?" he asked.

Alina slammed her elbow into Silas' ribs.

"oof! ..I guess not.." he said.

The woman shrugged. "Your losss... but if you change your mind, you'll know where to find me." she winked as Silas before walking off.

"You wanna buy my merchandise or not?" Alina mocked the woman. "You idiot..." she told Silas.

"What!? I didn't know what she was talking about!" Silas said.

"ugh...you're hopeless..." Alina rolled her eyes and started walking away.

"What?" Silas started walking after Alina but accidently bumped into a man. "Oh.. excuse me." Silas said.

The man, who was indeed a very large rough looking man, lifted Silas up by his arms quite easily.

"Who do you think you are!?" he yelled at Silas. A few more rough looking men gathered around.

"I said I was sorry. It was an accident." Silas explained.

Alina pushed her way through the fast forming crowd. "Leave him alone!" she yelled.

The man threw Silas on the ground and started walking toward Alina. He noticed her pendant. "Hmmm?" he took her pendant.

"Give that back!" Alina screamed as she reached for her pendant. A couple of men held her back.

"This is nice... it'll pick up a hefty price." the man grinned evilly. He motioned toward Silas. "Rough him up some!"

A couple of men started advancing toward Silas. They had knives in their hands.

Silas drew out his swords, but he knew he was outnumbered.

"Hee! Hee! Hee!" the men started advancing in on Silas.

"What's going on here!?"

Everyone turned around and saw a man standing there. He was tall and had long blue hair hair pulled back in a loose ponytail. He was holding a spear in his hand. He had a small flute at his side. He seemed angry.

"Well?" he repeated.

"What do you think you're...!?" started the man who stole Alina's pendant.

The guy with the spear turned around and thrust his spear forward. It grabbed Alina's pendant and he let it slide down his spear so he could grab it.

The man who was going to attack Silas forgot about him. "What are you doing!?"

They ran after him but he took his spear and knocked the knives out of their hands. He turned around and hit another guy coming after him across the face.

He looked at everyone. "Does anyon eelse want me to demonstrate some more?" he asked holding up his spear. The crowd of ruffians quickly dispersed leaving Silas, Alina, and the guy.

He walked over to Silas and helped him up. "You okay?" he asked.

"...yeah..." Silas replied.

He walked to Alina and held out her pendant. "I believe this is yours."

Alina took her pendant. "Th..thank you."

"You really should be more careful around her." he turned to Silas. "You don't just run into people around here and you..." he turned to Alina. "dont's let everyone know you know someone about to get their ass kicked. That was just stupid."

"Hey...what's your problem, anyway?" Silas asked.

"*My* problem!? What about..."

"Hey, you two! Cut that out!" Alina shouted... "He *did* just save us! Maybe you could be more grateful!" she told Silas.

"hmph!....thanks..." Silas grunted.

"..well..I'm *very grateful!" Alina told him.

"...you guys wanna drink? I'm going to the bar and I doubt you two should be alone in this town."

"Sure!" Alina said.

=======

Silas would have rather not had to go to Maliza. It was a destitute city that was home to more than its fair share of criminal activity and unsavory sorts. However the options weren't exactly practical or possible. Traveling straight from Dr. Mill's home to the port city Duriant would send him and Alina both to mountainous areas that neither had knowledge of how to traverse- too dangerous a thing to try with no experience. They couldn't travel around the forest Maliza was nested in either, as that would take too long and they didn't have the adequate supplies to last that long. So it was with much coercion from Alina that Silas finally agreed to travel into the Malizan forest.

Despite the fact that they had gotten lost quite a few times in the deeper, thicker parts of the woods it only took around three days for the pair to reach the outskirts of the city. It was easier to find when they were in close proximity as the air had somehow.. changed. There was something thicker about it, more polluted and unclean, and following it lead them closer to and into the city- even if was barely passable as a 'city'.

Stone pathways were cracked and chipped, occasionally giving way to potholes that would make carriage travel near impossible. Homes looked to be in the state of near dilapidation; with shutters falling from hinges, wood rotting and spackled with moss, and the gas powered street lamps were barely functioning, not giving much in the way of light to the city as the afternoon was fading to the night. Deeper in the heart of Maliza were the taller, larger buildings- not crafted of wood but of worn stone and discolored brick.

This was not a place that Silas and Alina felt particularly welcome or at ease at.

As they ventured further into the city Silas made sure Alina kept close and at his side while he kept an eye out on their surroundings. Hopefully there would be an inn they could stay in for the night. At worse they would have to take turns in sleeping, rather than leave themselves vulnerable to the unknown. Tomorrow, when the sun was up once more, would be the time to check the shops and restock on supplies.

"This place gives me the creeps..." An idle comment beneath Silas' breath was directed to Alina. She couldn't help but smile wryly as she hooked her arm in his.

"Leave it to you to state the obvious." Her tone soft and good natured. The wry smile she had waned some as her expression grew to one of worry as she glanced around. "I think we've passed this area. I remember that building."

"We have." Keeping it simple, Silas' eyes were locked ahead rather than risking a glance to Alina.

"Did you plan on telling me we were lost anytime soon?" She was trying to hide the annoyance in her tone and expression but couldn't quite keep it from the surface.

"If we passed by again, maybe..." Finally, Silas glanced aside to offer Alina a reassuring grin. "I didn't want to worry you. But you know, I've never actually *been* here before, so it's not like I'd know where all the inns are at. I'd have asked you but I get this inkling you haven't set foot here either."

"I haven't, no." A quick retort, before she stopped walking, forcing Silas to stop with her. Withdrawing her arm from his, she huffed quietly. "So are we to wander around aimlessly all night Silas?"

He sighed as he allowed his arm to fall away from Alina, then reached up to rub awkwardly at his neck. "I don't know? That wasn't exactly my plan. Neither of us know where to go, so what would you have me do?" Grinning, he gestured around and lowered his voice to a whisper. "Ask one of these *fine citizens* for directions?"

Alina wrinkled her nose, shaking her head. Any of the people they had seen looked anything *but* fine citizens. Ruffians and rogues, the lot of them. "N-no. But we can't just wander..."

"Alright then." Silas shrugged and watched her expectantly and with a smile. "You're the expert. What's our next move?"

"I-uh..."

So engrossed in their 'arguing' the pair hadn't taken notice of the sound of heels on concrete growing closer, or the woman who watched them both with a half-bemused, half-bored expression. She was tall and blonde with finely sculpted features and wearing quite the snug dress. The furs she adorned weren't easily discernable as fake or real, but the jewelry she wore looked too large and gaudy to be crafted of real gem and stone. Hanging loosely between her fingers was a freshly lit cigarette, the filter of which was line in the same crimson she painted her lips with. After partaking of a long drag from her cigarette the woman chuckled; low, sultry and throaty.

Startled by the sudden intrusion of another Alina quickly moved to retake her place near Silas, watching the woman warily. Amused, she took cigarette between her lips to hang there loosely then held up her hands to the pair in a defensive gesture.

"You can relax doll. If I meant any harm to either of ya I certainly wouldn't have announced myself in such an obvious manner." Dark eyes shifted between the two, lingering more so on Silas than Alina. Posture relaxing, cigarette was pulled away from her lips again. "You two definitely look out of place... here."

YouTubers?

Thu, 08 May 2008 19:03:49 GMT

So, on YouTube? There's lots of different stuff. Usually I use YouTube to watch.. like.. clips of stuff, or listen to music. I don't normally bother with the people with their own 'channels' and 'shows', but on a whim I clicked this one guy, and I've been watching his videos and I've been finding them pretty amusing. (The fact I got the Portal Reference though makes me wanna hurt Dani and Shaun ;P)

So here is one. (mild language, slightly harsh, yadda yadda, but I don't think any EFF BOMBZ were dropped. NSFW, some of his other videos are kinda 'bad' but you know, if you don't like it or any of them at any point, you can just stop watching. :) I don't watch the videos for the cursing and whatnot, I think there's more to them than that.)

And now I ask, is there anything or any one person on YouTube any of you like to watch?

Your task, should you choose to accept it...

Tue, 06 May 2008 18:44:31 GMT

Are you proud of what you write or draw? (Like the entirety of this post, the question posed isn't entirely rhetorical ;) )

When I first started to write, way back in the day, it wasn't for the sake of RP. It was for the sake of all these stories and ideas I got. However I was in like.. the seventh grade at the time. And as you know, a lot of what teenagers wrote then? Abysmal. Or perhaps it was just me. *chuckles* Anyways, it's also when I first started to draw. In regards to the writing, I remember being.. proud of it, at the time. That was relatively short lived though, when I came to realize I just wasn't that good of a writer. And with the art, I wasn't terribly proud of that, and even as I got better I've always been down on myself about it.

However.. as of late... I've grown to actually take enjoyment in my own art. My own writing. I know I'm far from anywhere even close to that realm of perfection, and I still strive to do better in both fields but right now? I'm actually in a place I feel I can be proud of what I can put out there. It's a really good feeling and I hope other writers and artists feel that way. To not hand someone a drawing saying "I drew this, but it isn't very good." but to hand it to them saying "I drew this, and I really like how it came out.". Or to write something with that same pride. There's nothing wrong in feeling pride or joy in a job well done. Nothing at all.

Something I'm going to do for fun and to see how far I've come along in writing is I'm going to dig up a really, super old piece of writing. And I'm going to take it and rewrite it with my current skills and knowledge.

I want you other writers out there to do the same.

It doesn't have to be a long scene. Or anything in particular. Just find an old snippet of writing that makes your soul cry, then rewrite it with those current skills of yours. Then? Put up both, oh yes, both pieces for the world to see on your LJ. I'll be doing that. ;) And it'll be horribly embarrassing, but ah well!

Let's start enjoying what we do and take some pride in it!

*runs off snickering as she starts typing out her old stuff*

In this post, I copy Mel.

Mon, 05 May 2008 17:37:10 GMT

And I post my mp3 Player's play list, which isn't all that big just yet, but ah well. XD

===

1. A Searing Struggle - YsIII

2. Aha - Take on Me

3. Alastair_Terranigma-Arkangel_RTS.mp3

4. Always - Saliva

5. Ashane+Zoast-07.05-Secret.of.Mana-Winter.Madness.mp3

6. AzureKevin - Distant World

7. AzureKevin - The Furthest Voyage

8. Back on Earth - Ozzy

9. Beatles - Real Love

10. Beborn Beton - The Colour of Love

11. Belle and Sebastian - White Collar Boy

12. Billy Joel - Pressure

13. Koelsh1 - Blind Eternity (Valkyrie Profile)

14. Bon Jovi - Always

15. Butterflies and Hurricanes - Muse

16. Calling - FFVII AC OST

17. Chrono_Trigger_Ruined_World_(Eternal_Derelict)_OC_ReMix

18. Cyan's Sorrow and Hope - Project Majestic Mix

19. Dancing With Myself - Billy Idol

20. Deep in the Heart of the Maze - Wizardry V

21. Depeche Mode - Useless

22. Donkey_Kong_Country_Riptide_OC_ReMix

23. Don't Change - INXS

24. Dorisu Dakkai_-_doris__rescue_24_VampireHunterD

25. Dreamer - Ozzy

26. Elemental - Tears for Fears

27. Elia, Maiden of Water - FFIII

28. Emptyeye_-_Assembling_the_Ironsword_Exposition(Wizards_&_Warriors_II_Ironsword)

29. Endlessly - Muse

30. EverythingisNothing_FFVIII_OC_ReMix - Sefiros

31. Final Fantasy Tactics - Antipyretic

32. Final Fantasy IV DS Big Land of the Dwarves

33. Final Fantasy IV DS Cry in Sorrow

34. Final Fantasy IV DS Prelude

35. Final_Fantasy_4_Tororian_Love_Song_OC_ReMix

36. Garasu Dama - L'Arc En Ciel

37. Green Amnesia OC Remix - Disco Dan

38. Hollow Life - Korn

39. I Just Want You - Ozzy

40. In My Life - Ozzy

41. Incredible Singing Robot - String Quartet

42. Land of Confusion - Disturbed

43. L'Arc En Ciel - Kasou

44. Lifehouse - Breathing

45. Love is Played - Wizardry Busin

46. Love Song for a Vampire - Annie Lennox

47. Magic Forest - Wizardry VI

48. Map of the Problematique - Muse

49. Mario Adventures - Super Mario Land Arranged

50. Mega Man - Boss Medley

51. MM2 - Wily Castle

52. mv_-_Aquamarine(Terranigma)

53. My First Arrangement (FF IV Main Theme) - Project Majestic Mix

54. Never Surrender - Valkyrie Profile 2

55. Nightmare's Beginning - FFVII Piano Arrangment

56. No Doubt - New

57. Of_Transformants_and_Brevity_OC_Remix (zyko)

58. Playing the Angel - Depeche Mode

59. Procol Harum - Whiter Shade of Pale

60. Queen - I want to Break Free

61. Queen - The Show Must Go On

62. Queen - Under Pressure

63. Queen - Who Wants to Live Forever

64. Requiem for the Gods (DoD Castlevania Arrangement)

65. Rize_-_Soul_of_Axe_Armor(Castlevania_Aria_of_Sorrow)

66. Record of Lodoss War - Fantasia of the Wind

67. Romancing SaGa 3 Last Battle (Quasar)

68. Samus Saves - Paragon

69. Sanctuary (zelda_2_dungeon)

70. Save Me - Remy Zero

71. Scenes from a Memory - Sixto Sounds, Suzumebachi, zircon (Voices of the Lifestream)

72. SecondChance_-_The_Smell_of_Yesterday's_Rain(Legend_of_Zelda_A_Link_to_the_Past)

73. Seeking Power - Final Fantasy XII

74. I Think I'm Paranoid - Shirley Manson

75. Sing Me Spanish Techno

76. Sonic_3_Knuckleduster_OC_ReMix_Daniel Baranowsky

77. Stockholm Syndrome - Muse

78. Subterranean Hell Arrangement (Castlevania DoS)

79. Such Great Heights - Ben Folds

80. Suffer Well - Depeche Mode

81. Tears for Fears - Creep Cover

82. Tears for Fears - Shout

83. The Cure - The Exploding Boy

84. The Darkest Star - Depeche Mode

85. The Eternal Melody of Ys

86. The Princess' Vision - Final Fantasy XII

87. The Ballad of Aquaman - The Social Bedders

88. Theme of the Empire - Final Fantasy XII

89. Tiesto - Adagio for Strings

90. To Make the End of Battle Arrangement - Ys

91. ToS - Fighting of the Spirit

92. Under the Palman Tree (Phantasy Star)

93. Uno - Muse

94. Valhalla Arrangement (Valkyrie Profile)

95. Vast - Free

96. Vast - Touched

97. Vay 06

98. Voltaire - When You're Evil

99. Vurez - Memoirs of the Green-Haired Folk

100. Within The Giant (Old Ejay Version) - Project Majestic Mix

101. Wizardry V Opening Theme

102. Zelda_64_Ocarina_Boogie_OC_ReMix

103. Zoola - Alive in the Desert (Earthbound)

Sun, 04 May 2008 06:10:18 GMT

No. No rants. Just random pictures. :)

Yay random pictures.

Still batting at 0. Rant Mode: ON

Fri, 02 May 2008 19:49:07 GMT

Maybe not 0. A couple good things have happened this week? I have discovered particularly cute kittens, even though a couple hate me and hiss at me like I'm a gigantic scary monster of doom, the siamese seems to like me. I'll try to get pictures up sometime. I didn't take many though so I might not have any good ones. Didn't want to freak the cats out and all, ya know?

I've also discovered bad things. Like a dead kitten. It gets worse though. The mother of this kitten? Was licking it, in spite of it's.. being dead. Now, I've tried to remain emotionally distant from the outside cats, cuz any time I get attached to something? Heart? Torn to shreds. Ripped up and just.. thrown in a wood chipper. And this has gone pretty well, though I'm sure I've come across cold to my mother. I'm not normally that cold, and I don't like it per se, but remaining distant from things emotionally saves me a good deal of mental sanity. Just.. seeing that momma cat lick it's dead baby? The only baby it had? That really got to me and upset me. He wasn't even stiff when I found him, and looked like one of the toms had killed him.

I had planned to go out earlier too. So what if I had? Maybe I could have prevented that. Maybe not. Either way I still feel pretty crappy for it. But I consoled myself with loving on other kittens. Of course one of said kittens I just discovered bears a resemblance to one I really loved that died... Reminders, bleh

Fast forward to today. Dentist's appointment. Did that go bad? Naturally.

I knew I had a couple cavities, but nothing too big. Lo and behold I find out? I don't have one, or two, or even three cavities. I have nine. Nine. That's just.. gah. So I'm gonna have to get fillings. Silver fillings. I'm not thrilled *at all* about that. Then I lament to mom about it and how if I ever have an MRI it'll rip them outta my head and magnets blah blah blah etc and she lols at me, and tells me she's had plenty of MRIs and she has a filling and its silver and it didn't get ripped out of her head. So it's probably not as bad as I think... and apparently the ones that are tooth colored don't hold up well and crack and chip and fall out a lot, and these would go waaaaay back in my mouth. So it's not like anyone can see them.

And the wisdom teeth have to come out. Surgically. Not for a while though at least.. but they're impacted in the gums so that'll be around 800$ to get them cut out and whatnot. 250$ of that is solely to put me under anesthesia. I've never been put to sleep like that in my life, so I'm terrified of that thought. Terrified. What if I don't wake up? What if I'm not all the way asleep? I've seen the horror stories.

(Also? It's good I stopped watching House, srsly)

After the dentist, we decide to eat out for lunch. Brilliant me chose the restaurant, one we had been to before that never sucked. But today for some reason? It sucked. First, it took forever for the waitress to tend to us, the drinks cost a horrific amount of money, she never even freaking bothered to refill my drink (1.89 for a glass-with a lot of ice!- and ONE refill), and she got my mom's order wrong! Me? I decide to try something different, so I get some tortellini alfredo. I *love* tortellini and I **love** alfredo sauce. I opted not to get chicken added cuz it was already 10$ and chicken means 3 additional dollars.

My mom ordered a burger and onion rings. Got a burger and fries, but it was good at least.. I got a side salad with my meal, which was good, and some garlic bread which was just.. like... not garlic bread. It was more like garlic crust. And hard. I couldn't eat a lot of it since my teeth were kinda sore. Then out comes my plate. Already it looks terrible. The sauce has separated so it's a beautiful (/sarcasm) mix of white and yellow.. The yellow being terribly buttery and greasy. The sauce was really really really thin too. Like water. But I ate it. And complained to mom the whole time. Cuz.. like.. I've microwaved meals that've come out better than that. And seriously, we can get a bag of tortellini pasta and a jar of alfredo sauce and cook that and make enough for two and have it taste better *and* cost less.

When mom mentioned to the waitress that she got her order wrong, you know what the brilliant woman did? She stared at my mom. As if in another place entirely. She wasn't at all apologetic. Just stared, and eventually was all "DER HUR HUR?"

Even *I* told my mom not to leave a tip. And *I'm* usually the one that makes my mom leave tips regardless of service, even if just a dollar or two if we can, since I know waitresses don't make much. But holy crap, if you're off in la la land and act like you can't even speak the same freaking language, no. No tip for you.

And then later when mom was yelling at me about something I accidentally stood in the middle of an ant pile. A fire ant pile. Luckily I noticed and threw the shoe off before pain commenced.

...

I need a nap or something.

Thu, 01 May 2008 05:46:00 GMT

Life.. kinda blows sometimes. Now is one of those sometimes. It's pretty depressing, but it'll pass. Usually does, so it can come back and repeat.

Rather than go into all the details of the sucktitude of my life, I will instead say I found a very cute, fat kitten today, with long grey and white fur. It was adorable. Its sibling is a siamese kitten. They'll be easy to find homes for. Since people are vain and want beautiful exotic cats. No, black cats and tabbies are devil spawn, therefore, not good enough.

Oh, yay, there's that pessimism.

Getting back on that optimistic trail, I think my artwork is improving, even if slowly. Here's a before and after of sorts, of my take on Hawk Jahad. :D Who isn't mine.

The left was done about a year and a half ago, the right was finished up just a little while ago.

Bad day.. yay..

Mon, 28 Apr 2008 05:39:32 GMT

Today has not been terribly great.

It started out with me having weird dreams this morning. Two back to back, both involving a friend of mine's death. Was bizarre. Inspired me to IM them today and talk with them some. That was nice. Catching up and confirming they weren't dead.

Lots of storms. I hate storms. So I ended up watching a movie earlier. Great Expectations. It was interesting, and it was also.. just.. bleh. Like, nothing ever works out like that in real life. You don't love someone and then separate for years and years and then just pick up from where you left off when reunited. Heck, many don't even do that after months.. let alone the years. And you don't get rewarded for good deeds. No... no one ever returns a favor in kind nowadays. No one ever does anything good just to be good. They want and take, but do something in return? Pfaw!

So after storm settled down, it was time to go feed the cats outside. That's when m'day did that sudden sucktacular thing. Me and mom go out, and we're looking around, and I see one of the little cats. Zelda's her name. Her brother is Link. Yeah.. I'm a nerd. But Zelda is a little bitty kitty. Real cute, not.. particularly affectionate though. She doesn't like my mom, but she likes me, and hovers around me and lets me pet her. Anyways, I see her sitting there, but when she sees it's time to eat ,she doesn't get up to walk, no. She starts dragging herself around, because it seems she can't move her hind legs.

Naturally I'm upset at seeing this, cuz that's not right, and mom's concerned too. Touching her and picking her up and such didn't result in any outward display of pain. No meowing or crying or contorting. She seemed.. otherwise okay, aside from the fact she's not moving her back legs. And.. she moved them a little, and moved her tail, so it's not a matter of paralysis, I don't think? I'm not sure what happened. Whether something hit her, or if it was a snake bite, or.. what. But.. yeah. It wasn't a good situation at all. The kicker though? She's recently had babies. So it's decision time.

Do we take her in, and leave her babies to die (we have no idea where they're at), or let her go back to her babies in her condition. I honestly opted for taking her in... but mom wouldn't have that, and didn't want to leave her babies. (Was a lose/lose decision really, so if anyone has any nasty comments about that, you can just keep them to yourself) The plan was to watch and follow her and find babies and take them all and get mommy cat cared for, but... it started to storm really bad. It got dark. There was no light. The cat went somewhere and we don't know where. It's likely she's with her kittens, but yeah, still not a great situation. I feel terrible for the fact she's still .. out there. And there's not much to be done. We went out after the storm settled to look for them, but it was too dark, and mom was freaking and yelling at me for random things (which really helped the situation, lemme tell ya).

Tbh, I'm not expecting to find this cat (or babies) alive.

Tomorrow (29th) is my birthday. Happy birthday L.

I tried to call tonight when I probably shouldn't have. I only had to call one duel though. Interest for regular duels aren't a lot during big events? I was pretty abysmal. Just in a terrible mood overall and lost my patience finally in regards to certain things. L did finally learn a valuable lesson though.. but yeah. Thanks to the ones (who know who they are) that let me rant and lament to them and/or goofed a little with me on iscribble. I was (still am?) just really sad, so a little humor helped perk me up some. Hopefully when I wake up things will be.. not as bad. But I'm not counting on a happy ending when it comes to the cat.

I've probably ranted and rambled enough now. :\

Raaaainbow

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 18:17:59 GMT

Since I'm not feeling particularly eloquent, I'll share a picture for this entry like I've seen others do ^^;...or maybe not cuz it's a big picture and I can't figure out how to show a thumbnail or anything like that... So a link to a picture instead! It nearly stormed here last night and.. just didn't, and there was a rainbow in the sky (it's almost a double, there's a super faint one above it) and I thought it was neat cuz I never get to see rainbows. :(

Aaaand, I want to share this animated .gif I made too, because everyone should see it. :D

Fri, 18 Apr 2008 05:49:56 GMT

Okay. So I took a quiz I saw on elf_fu's journal who found it at Life in the Garden of Eden.

"Devoutly dedicated to helping lead others to glory, you are a strong, supportive, and spiritual caregiver."

I have never watched Babylon 5 so this means nothing to me. :\

Wed, 16 Apr 2008 22:55:36 GMT

Okay. This relates to the thing I wrote about in my last locked entry. That... bugs me more than it ought to. But since I want to hear some advice from people, this entry is open for all to see.

I pose you this question, meant to be taken in a hypothetical fashion:

If you felt ripped off/plagarized, in character/setting/writing/etc concept, would you confront the person who made you feel that way? Even if just to find out if it were intentional or not?

I really am curious. I've had one say it's probably not the best of ideas. You can't easily prove it, and things are never 'original' anymore and people lift things (intentional or not) all the time, blah blah blah.

I'm at the point now just sitting back in silence is driving me nuts, but if people really think it's a bad idea, I can go that route too, rather than make an arsehat of myself. Just.. given some of the circumstances and factors involved in this... This bothers me.

It bothers me a lot.

Tue, 15 Apr 2008 06:06:37 GMT

These are funny. Go look at them. Now.

Still doing sketches. Check 'em out. :)

My DA page view is almost 2000. This makes me warm and fuzzy inside. It's nothing compared to some with millions of page views or whatever, but still. Small goals. Yeeeey.

Corlanthis sent me naughty pix. I now have blackmail against him. Bwahahaha.*

*Might be a slight exaggeration

Meek Pu. Well, ranting, actually.

Mon, 14 Apr 2008 08:32:37 GMT

Us vs. Them

Seriously?

Seriously???

Some people still wanna carry the whole us vs. them mentality around? Site X vs. Site B? The majority of people have MOVED ON, and still there are some psychos hemming and hawwing and how HARDY HAR PEOPLE FROM SITE X ARE TEH SUCK? Most people from the "fighting sites" don't even know what's going on because it's.. it's nothing. Not even a blip on the radar. Yet it's sad that they're lumped in along with some group of two or three bad apples.

Yes. That makes the whole site bad and horrible and awful. Let's go to war with them. That's the mature thing.

Grow up plz~

Should L be allowed to touch computers? No. She should not.

Sun, 13 Apr 2008 08:15:18 GMT

Right, so it's 4 AM, and I'm talking to my awesome RP partner, and my typing skills degrade srsly as the hour progresses and... yeah. I bolded points of interest.

Me: She can't get a harden that way
Me: ...garen
Me: gardne
AwesomePlayPartner: LOL
Me: GARDNE
Me: ...
Me: !! ><
Me: Gardne
[Me: ....
APP: He can, though
Me: I can't typ eit!!!
APP::groan::
APP: ::facepalm::
Me: What?
Me: Garden
Me: YAY
APP: look up
APP: thinking about what I said
Me: OMG!

Cookies 4 j00 if you get it.

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 18:53:48 GMT

I feel like I should be passing out tissues for people to wipe the brown off their nose now. Or maybe give them cans of gasoline to fuel their flame wars.

Geez.

It saddens me that society doesn't seem to smile upon people being mature and acting adult anymore.

Wed, 09 Apr 2008 05:00:45 GMT

Someday, I'll figure it out.

Sorry, but I couldn't resist.

Sat, 05 Apr 2008 15:02:29 GMT

Art, art and.. well.. art. -.-

Fri, 04 Apr 2008 00:47:09 GMT

Rwar. I don't really have much of anything to say. Such is my oh-so-very-exciting life. :\

I entered an art contest with this, and .. and.. didn't win. :( Didn't even make a runner up. Hurray for me! I'll probably try to enter some other contest I found. And I bet I fail in that too. :\ But who knows. I entered a contest at Seventh Sanctum a couple years ago and lost, so maybe this time I'll do better.

Sketch-A-Days!
3-31: Saria
4-1: Baker
4-2: zomg failed!
4-3: Elly
4-3: Llama Al

I should do an art trade or two sometime. :\ If anyone is interested they can lemme know?

Hello Panic Attack, my name is L

Sun, 30 Mar 2008 21:48:02 GMT

So it's probably not a big secret that L loves her cat more than anything. Don't get me wrong - I love *all* my cats. But my oldest, the one I've had for going on 11 years now, that is my heart and soul right there. He's also like his mommy (me), very accident prone. He's the genius that horked into my electrical sockets the other night. This afternoon, I guess he figured it would be nice to give mommy a full fledged panic attack. THANKS A LOT PRECIOUS SON o' MINE!

I was sitting at my computer working on a sweet sketch for my FF Fan Art project. My cat sees my cell phone plugged in and decides that he just has to play with the cord and tug on it. Somehow he ends up unplugging the cord from the phone and gets the phone off the table to hurl downwards right. into. his. face. Which is bad enough, that would have freaked me out right there, but no, my cat? He opens his mouth as wide as he can, in this.. silent scream. Like he's just *agonizing*. I.. well.. I panic. These thoughts are going through my head.. what if his nose is broke, what if his jaw is broke, oh my god we're going to have to put him down, oh my god he's hurt he's hurt...

I started to bawl.

So mom hears this, and is all "What's wrong what's wrong?!" so I pick up my cat as careful as I could, still bawling and trying to soothe him, and toddle off to her room, panicking, crying, and practically dry heaving by this point.

THE BEST PART IS BY NOW MY CAT IS OKAY AND PURRING AS IF NOTHING EVER HAPPENED!

Of course his mommy has succumbed too far to the panic to effectively calm down. So while sniffling away, I set him on the bed in front of my mom and start to regale her with the story of woe. Meanwhile he's purring and flipping and rolling around. I start to calm, but it really took me a while to get to the point of not crying and sniffling. Mom looks him over, we hold him and smooch and snuggle and make a big fuss over him and he eats it up.

So things are okay now. They were never really bad to begin with. He probably did hurt himself there, but mommy just panicked about his owwie facial expressions. It's not the first time I've panicked over him either. There was a time we had to take him to the vet on an emergency call because he was in a lot of pain. Was crying and meowing and stuff. I cried the entire trip there and the entire trip back because we had to leave him overnight. Wasn't anything terribly serious though. Just required some medicine and dietary changes.

Before the panic attack of '08 struck things were really nice earlier today. I slept in cuz I felt a little nauseous and he cuddled with me *all day*. ^_^ Had his head on the pillow next to mine with all his little paws wrapped around me. He's such a good boy. When I'm sick or sad he's there. The other day I was sad about something and he hopped on the couch with me and snuggled with his face on mine, cheek to cheek.

As he gets older though I'm going to have to cat proof my room... oy vey.

In other news, frogs are apparently going extinct. :( It was some article in the newspaper mom showed me. It made me sad, as frogs/toads are my second favorite animal and I love em.

Today needs to get better soon. *sigh* We're getting Subway for supper though, so that's a start. :)

SKETCH A DAYS! (I love working in greyscale~)

3-29: Citan Uzuki
3-30: Bane

Also, with the picture I'm currently working on, I wanted to do a forest-y background. However I fail at backgrounds. So if anyone knows a good forest/background tutorial (How to draw them, not shop them) please lemme know? :)

Fri, 28 Mar 2008 23:28:02 GMT

So last night? My cat decided it'd be a good idea to vomit on my electrical outlets. So I hear *HORK HORK HORK FIZZLE CRACKLE POP FIZZZZLE*

So that couldn't possibly be good. And it wasn't. It had sparks, and smelled like burning. So I had to unplug it from the wall, do some cleaning and drying, and let it sit overnight all unplugged. It works fine today though, without sparking and burning, so that's good! My cat shouldn't do that though! I'm super glad he's okay. And didn't end up frying himself.. *sigh* Will have to keep a closer eye on him when he's in here.

Anyhoo my Sketch-A-Day today is... Elly from Xenogears, as per eve_dot_com's suggestion. ^^ Spent more time on it than I should have, but I couldn't help mahself.

Sketch-A-Day

Thu, 27 Mar 2008 20:49:07 GMT

So I'm going to try to start doing at least one sketch a day, even if it's super simple, etc, whatever. Because other people do it and it just seems like a good idea? *shrug* Anyways, to start it out, I have sketched teh Samus Aran from Metroid. XD

Not super cutesy or perky or happy go lucky, but good grief, considering who she is and what she does she probably shouldn't be? And the way I picture her, she does not have monstrous breasts, kthx. (Oh noez, realism in a video game)

Samus!

If anyone has ideas or requests for sketches, lemme know? I just may do it. (Cuz sketches = tons easier than a finished pic)